It’s Illegal to Read This in Cedar Rapids

Whatever you’re looking for is at your fingertips with the internet.  The only thing you can’t get on the internet is a good read.  I’m not talking about reading, like a book or anything along those lines.  I’m talking about reading your thoughts and knowing your future.   

There was a time when we did have that technology but with the breakdown of the Psychic Friends Network, featuring the many memorable readers like Psychic to the stars, Linda Georgian, yes, you heard me right, LINDA GEORGIAN!  She knows we are talking about her, right now, I bet you, and the spokesperson Dionne Warwick were amazing.... at taking a paycheck.  Sure, you could have a doctor do a telehealth visit and whirl their sorcery or you can rely on solid psychic advice.   

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Before you seek this amazing advice make sure you aren’t doing it in the Cedar Rapids city limits.  There is a law from round about 1943, that forbids palm reading in the city of Cedar Rapids.  I guess the city prefers to tell your future. In fact, it is illegal to tell fortunes or practice phrenology, palmistry, or clairvoyance, in the city.  Yes, how dare you get your phrenology all over the city.  While we’re at it, here’s a good Halloween costume.  Go as Claire Voyance, dress any way you’d like, and no matter what people say to you, you say “I knew you were going to say that”.   

Anyway, back to your palm-reading illegality in Cedar Rapids.  Stop getting me sidetracked on Halloween costumes with goofy names.  If you’re dead set on palmistry you’ll have to go outside the city limits, now git!!  The law has been revisited but there has clearly, not been enough time to amend or change it.